What Is Self-Control?

Self-control is the ability to think straight and not get carried away in any situation. It is the will power a person has to clearly understand consequences and say no to things they do not need.  It is the talent of knowing when to quit, even if it means quitting cold turkey. Self-control is the ability to restrain one’s self mentally and physically.

Mind Over Matter

Self-control is frequently associated with routine, discipline, restraint and mental focus. Mind over matter.
This said, self-control might seem or sound hard, to certain people, willpower over food, alcohol, emotions and many other desires.
There are people with willpower who are just naturally focused or intuitive when it comes to doing anything. On the other hand, there are people with willpower issues. People who find it difficult to relax, and whose minds are a constant will power battle. One good thing about self-control is that it and can be improved with time and practice in a person’s life and the changes are significant.

The Lack of Self-control

“If you lose self-control everything will fall.” – John Wooden

Not having self-discipline on the other hand, is very self-destructive for anybody.
People with poor self-control have a hard time committing to positive behaviour in every instance. They have difficulty controlling emotions or maintaining friendships.
Also, they lose attention quickly, hardly have or reach set goals. For them, it is a constant battle for willpower and motivation.
Self-discipline for these types of people is really difficult. Hence, it is hard to stop habits like nail-biting or smoking and effortless to exaggerate on other practices like being lazy and over-eating.

Too Much Self-Control

Yes, too much self-control exists. This behaviour is called ‘overcontrol’, and just like poor willpower, it is not a positive attribute.
People with too much self-discipline tend to have difficulty relaxing.
They avoid taking any kind of risk, have a super rigid personality and like to distance themselves from people.
They are also ‘overly’ responsible, hardly show their true emotional feelings and most likely tend to be a ‘pain in the butt’.

How to Have and Balance Self-Control

To be able to have self-control, there must be a balance.
This way, you do not end up with too much or too little of it. Strive to see what your limits are and workaround it.


Learn how to relax and take things easy. Breathe slowly and count your breaths as well.
Meditation and being mindful are brilliant ways to practice relaxation. These forms of recreation can take your mind off over-drive and lets you calmly approach a stressful situation, giving clarity for thoughtful responses or choices.

Think of the Repercussions

With every choice comes repercussion. It is helpful to always think of the aftermath. Constantly remind yourself of the aftereffect of every step or decision you take before carrying out an action and put yourself in other people’s shoes. How would you feel if someone does the same to you?
Definitely, it will not be an easy task, but it gets better the more you try.

Plan It Out

As opposed to relying on willpower, it is always better to have a written or visual plan of what to do in different situations.
Plan activities that will distract you from bad habits and plan to do things at times of the day, not to mention what you will say in different scenarios.

As mentioned previously, a lot of people do not have the power of self-control. I, myself inclusive.